Our millennial friends love to challenge the status quo. Is it possible that this natural push back may also develop destructive habits and limit opportunity? What starts out as authentic questioning may result in discounting valuable principles that don’t change with time. For my non-judgmental friends and leaders of the twenty and thirty somethings, I ask for your indulgence in questioning the question (not the questioner) and to consider the paradigm of meaningful discomfort.
In making 2017 the best year ever, let’s consider embracing meaningful discomfort as one method to becoming more holistic. Learning to articulate the beautiful language of Millennials doesn’t mean that we can’t also articulate and cross-pollinate the language of other generations in a way that adds to possibilities.
I do a little farming and I believe at times I have a relationship with seeds. When we plant corn for example, the seeds need to be buried a few inches for the germination process to begin. For a seed, it may seem pretty gloomy, buried in the earth with little control of what is happening above the ground. If a seed could think (and who says they can’t), it might wonder why they couldn’t just be spread on top of the earth and forego the dark and dreary experience of being buried. That practice of planting also works, but in spreading the seeds above the ground, a very small percentage will actually take root. What may seem like a situation that causes significant discomfort at first (being buried in the earth), is really both a protection against the elements of destruction and an opportunity to germinate, spread their roots, break the earth’s surface and grow in the sunlight to maximum potential.
In terms of Millennials, In their quest to not be trapped “in the box,” or in situations that take away too many options, consider the following four reasons to experience meaningful discomfort, keeping in mind the analogy of the seeds.
- Too many options. Keeping all of our options open may block meaningful commitment. Focusing on the most beneficial options and acting on them does not necessarily close the other doors. For example, if you are flying an airplane and you’ve charted your course using waypoints (short term goals), to ultimately arrive at your destination, you have not really limited your options, rather, you’ve clarified the path.
- Too many easy commitments. Because of the fear of living life in the box where freedom of many choices may be extinguished, many easy short-term commitments are made. However, some commitments that will bring great long-term completeness (such as commitment to a life-partner). Making such a commitment may transcend any short term fears of not being in control of your life. Perhaps a part of your plan for the abundant life is going in fewer directions with greater energy.
- Self-protection. Sometimes real commitment feels uncomfortable or even dangerous; risky even, but the real danger is never making them. I understand from experience, that once burned, it is difficult to travel that road again. I once was burned by a business associate of many years. The situation actually cost me many sleepless nights and resulted in a form of PTSD. How could I ever trust another person again? And yet, if I made a vow of self-protection and didn’t again trust in the goodness of the human spirit, I would limit my joy and my hope for the abundant life going forward. The phrase “what we lose in the fire we find in the ashes” is true.
- Too many exceptions. It is said that sometimes an exception is an expensive lie. Deciding to make exceptions to what might be considered the logical path to success, usually results in the exceptions themselves turning into bad habits. In the seed planting analogy, if we make an exception to burying the corn and simply spread it on top of the soil, this exception of planting in the customary way is catastrophic. Sometimes exceptions are made because of convenience, (it’s just easier to skip a step, take shortcuts to the process of progression), but in the end, the exceptions result in a scattered and inconsistent harvest.
I love how Millennials challenge the status quo and ask questions. But I suggest also that thoughtful considerations be given to following some paths that are proven but which you have not yet embraced.
Think of it this way. In a world of cross-fit mania—where physical challenges in exercise actually brings about pain; in the end the challenges also bring incredible fulfillment and joy.
Before closing the door on paths that have been proven because you may think they will “box you in,” you might consider a journey on those paths also. This might be the best of all worlds. This is the process of meaningful discomfort; focusing on beneficial options, limit the number of trails traveled at the same time, putting forth more energy on the trails you’re traveling, not limiting your choices in an act of self-preservation, and making exceptions to a proven process.
